Every Christmas season, I inevitably hear someone say, “Ugh. I haven’t done any decorating yet. I need to get the stuff out of the attic this weekend. I’m so behind.”
My last Christmas season in retail, someone said this to me at the sink in the ladies’ room, and I almost said it: “Don’t then. Don’t decorate. You don’t need to do this at all.”
It was right there on my tongue. But I stopped it. Instead, I just nodded sympathetically and said something like, “Oh gosh, yeah. Have a good day.”
I stopped decorating for Christmas when I was telecommuting twice or three times monthly to my job that was ten states away.
After spending hours upon hours in hotels and airports, worn down by travel, I was literally too exhausted to pull the tree, the three boxes of fish ornaments, the 13 window candles, the fishing Santas and the 4-foot lighted, rocking dolphin out of the closets. Because it meant I had to do more than pull them out of the closets. I had to clear space for them, put them up, put the boxes away, clean up, get the boxes back out, take them down and put every…single…thing away for another year.
That’s a lot of handling, a lot of effort. And for what? We didn’t have young children or even teens in the house. Just me, Jimmy and the corgis. And I was tired. So very tired.
After a couple of years of telecommuting in my late forties, I began to understand that my energy was not unlimited after all. It was finite. I had to make a decision about what that energy was allotted to.
The tree, the fish ornaments and the rocking dolphin lost out. I no longer had the energy for them. And letting them stay in the closet that year was freeing. It allowed me to focus my very finite energy on things that mattered more—our family gathering in PA and the LOL funny game we play each year. Mass with my brother on Christmas Eve and then dinner with my youngest brother’s family. Thinking about my spiritual growth and how it had changed in a year.
I haven’t decorated for Christmas since that year.
Today a Facebook friend posted 26 photos of her Christmas decorations, with a post that lamented being so late with her decorating—five days before Christmas. It was beyond a tree and some lights. Her entire home was Christmased in shades of cream, red, gold and silver. Dazzling garlands and candles on every shelf and mantel. Contemporary lamps that look like they’re made of ice. Pillows made to look like wrapped up presents in shiny gold. Special faux fur throws that one would never actually use. Every square inch was re-worked and given a new, high gloss.
She’s a business woman who travels a lot. She has children. Where does she get the energy? Why does she get the energy?
If it makes her happy, great. If it’s beginning to not make her happy, I have a radical suggestion: let it go.
Decorating for Christmas is not mandatory. It is not a pre-requisite for individual or family happiness. It is not a must have, but a nice to have. And when it’s not nice to have it anymore, admit it and let it go.
It doesn’t mean you don’t have “Christmas spirit” (whatever that is). It means your sprit can be a little calmer. It means you can rest a bit. It means you might be more available for things that truly do give you joy.
You have permission to rest and not decorate. You will very likely be happier. And you will still be loved.
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